I’ve been keeping some life updates on the DL lately.
While it’s no secret that I’ve spent the last year traveling (over 300 days to get specific) what I haven’t advertised, at least not to the masses anyway, is that I’ve been trying to move to London for quite a while now.
I had the great privilege of doing life in (what I believe to be) the greatest city in the world for almost 3 months last year, and they ended up being 3 of my favorite months of my entire life. The funny thing is, I didn’t even mean for it to happen.
As you may know, I left America last August to travel around Europe for (what I originally thought would be) 3 months. I planned to pop into London for the month of September to stay with my friend Haley (who had moved there temporarily) and kill some time that I had between travels. I'd been before and liked it perfectly fine but to be honest, what I really wanted was to fill that month with some other destinations that I hadn’t already seen.
Except in really no time at all, I fell completely head over heels in love with London. It wasn’t until I did life there that I found a new found appreciation for everything about it. I loved the people, the culture, the architecture. I loved how you never, ever run out of things to do. I loved going for runs in Hyde Park and commuting on the tube- even in the worst chaos of rush hour. I loved my new friends and their English accents. I loved learning to recognize British culture and mannerisms. I loved my church where I went every Sunday, and my gym I’d go to most afternoons. I loved shopping for groceries at M+S just around the corner from our flat. I loved strolling through Covent Garden and Carnaby and along the Thames. I loved every last little molecule about the entire city.
It was the first time in my life that I’ve felt such intense passion about someplace like that. Everything seemed to click right into place and I felt more content than I ever had before. Within a few short weeks I was already scheming ways that I could navigate the confusion of international relocation, because I didn’t want London to be another destination- I wanted it to be home.
For the short term, my immediate solution was to extend my trip a bit longer. As you may already know, instead of flying back to the states at the end of October like I had originally planned, I bailed on spending Thanksgiving at home so that I could stay in Europe for 6 more weeks. What I didn’t advertise, was that I would be staying in my favorite city just about the entire time so that I could start making moves to (hopefully) stay for good.
Those six weeks were filled with various sorts of investigations. I spent afternoons in line at the U.S. Embassy (which, to save you some time if you’re also interested in relocation, is not where you go for that). I researched visas for entrepreneurs that came with crazy requirements like £2,000,000 of investment funds.
I looked into going back to a full-time roll in the social media realm (which is what I did prior to blogging) in hopes that a company would sponsor me so I could get a visa that way. While I knew it would take a lot of work to juggle a career and keep my blog running full speed ahead, I was absolutely willing to do it if it meant I got to do life in my favorite city. What I didn’t fully realize was the impact Brexit was already having on expats, even though it's just beginning to be negotiated. After many meetings, applications, research and effort, everyone I've talked to (while all of them so kind + genuinely helpful) expressed it’s simply too much of a risk right now to onboard someone who isn’t a UK citizen or already an employee within the company- because they just don't know what the future holds for non-citizens.
Even upon returning to the states after my 6 weeks ran out, I continued to check the UK visa site practically every day, desperately searching for a loophole I must have missed. Meanwhile, I planned a return trip for the spring, which I hoped would allow some time for the dust to settle and progress to be made (hence why I just made my recent two-month stint in Europe where I made a few stops back to London). Unfortunately, I found the dust hasn’t settled and I found all the same answers I did on my last trip. Basically, no matter what visa option I've looked into, I don't have enough sorted to qualify just yet.
My point of this long, drawn out story isn’t to throw a pity party or wallow because my plans haven’t worked out the way I’d hoped. On the contrary, it’s made me realize how lucky I am to already be a citizen of an amazing country. In the midst of the refugee crisis I’ve witnessed first-hand while traveling through Europe, I don’t take for granted in the slightest that I’m not in peril danger or being forced out of my home with nowhere else to go. I’m simply a privileged American who wants to move from one first-world country to another— purely for my enjoyment.
While I’ve certainly gained some perspective throughout the process, that doesn’t mean it’s not disappointing to be kept from living where you want to live. So while I'm not giving up on London forever, I also realize that it could potentially be years before the right opportunity for me to get there becomes available.
So what do I do in the meantime? I've spent a lot of time asking myself that over the past few months. I travel a ton anyway so the easy answer seemed to be to wait it out in Nashville doing what I've been doing.
But awhile ago I read something that said: “Within us are two forces: a pull toward security — preservation of ourselves as we are— and a pull toward growth. Whichever we hold as more precious, we cultivate.”
At the risk of sounding cheesy, travel really does change you, and it certainly has changed me over the years. It's allowed me to see the world through a global lens beyond my everyday bubble. It's introduced me to so many different ways one can choose to live their life. It's provided me with possibility and perspective about things I never noticed before. In short, it's changed my driving desire from security to growth. So while I will always love Nashville, it no longer feels like a place that is bringing this new side of me to life, challenging me or inspiring me the way I'm looking for right now-- simply because it's too comfortable for me. And I don't want my life to be something that tempts me to drop into cruise control or coast. I want a life that's alive, vibrant, full of discovery and makes me happy to be where I am.
So I’ve decided it’s time to try on life in another one of my favorite cities- one where I don’t need a visa.
I packed up my car last week and headed to Chicago! This place has always been one of my favorite cities in the world and I'm so excited to finally be here (I've spent the past week settling in, which is why I've been a bit MIA). Not only is the weather gorgeous this time of year but Chicago offers so many of the qualities that I fell in love with about London (things I think I'll want from any place I decide to call home moving forward): big-city-energy, tons of parks, endless things to do, diverse cultures from all around the world, amazing restaurants and, of course, a major airport serving countless destinations all around the globe. I'm so excited to dive right into all these things, to meet new people, discover new favorite places and let myself fall in love with life in a new city just like I did last September.
While I’m genuinely thrilled about all of this, let me be very clear: this doesn’t mean I have my life perfectly figured out right now. Relocation is messy- especially when you’ve been mentally and emotionally juggling three cities (London, Chicago and Nashville) like I have been lately. At the moment, I'm physically in Chicago with a bunch of my belongings + staying with family (who is abundantly generous to host me for a bit). A lot of my other things are still back at my place in Nashville (which I still have for now). And all the while, pieces of my heart are scattered in both places, along with the massive chunk of it that’s still in London. So what do you do with all of that?
I debated not publicly announcing anything, or only showing some of my cards: ("I'm moving to Chicago!" -- omitting the fact that getting to London has been a giant fail.) The main reason for considering those options is because I know from a life of non-stop travel that complicated life decisions yield loads of questions, confused faces and exhausting conversations. I find that people tend to prefer talking about things are definite and easy to understand. Black or white. Yes or no. In or out. I'll also admit that in addition to feeling like people want to hear simple answers, I equally am guilty of wanting to be able to give simple answers. Sometimes it's tempting to just pretend like I have more figured out than I do.
But I believe that honesty and vulnerability are vital to a good story. So watering down the truth about what's going on in my life not only adds to the societal myths and pressures that you have to "have it all figured out" or "everyone else's lives work out perfectly", it also kills the storyline, mystery + excitement of the process. So basically, all of this rambling is just an honest, long-winded way of saying:
I'm ready for a new challenge that's not Nashville.
I still hope to move to London someday, but visas make that timeline unknown.
Until then, I'm excited for my adventure in Chicago + am trusting I'm right where I'm supposed to be.
I may fall even more in love with Chicago than I did with London and decide to stay forever. I may find this is only a season and be right back at the drawing board. I honestly have no clue what to expect as my life unfolds here- but I do know that I don't want to let the fear of a complicated season paralyze me or keep me in a place that I've outgrown.
Unless you're someone who knows me personally, this really won't even impact you at all (except for seeing the Chicago skyline a bit more around these parts!) My blog will continue to operate the same way it always has. I'm still going to be traveling and creating resources to help you do the same (I have some really exciting trips coming up that I can't wait to announce!) But the reason I felt compelled to share the intricate details of this story and side of my life with everyone goes back to the heartbeat of why I started Blonde Atlas in the first place: to inspire you to live your best life. And in order to do that, I believe it's important to be honest about everything that comes with that.
Chasing after the life you want is guaranteed to involve risk, roadblocks, uncertainty and figuring some things out as you go. There will be voices that tell you "It's all too much work" or "It just doesn't make sense." In fact, our brains are scientifically wired to stop us from doing things that are uncomfortable, uncertain or scary in order to protect us and survive. But at the risk of sounding dramatic or cliché, I believe sacrificing a life inside a comfort zone for the sake of living a better, richer + fuller story is the only kind of life worth living.
So here's to not having everything figured out just yet. If you're feeling stuck and don't know what your next move is: stay curious and open-minded. If you're already knee deep in the mess of your own journey: take heart + keep putting one foot in front of the other. But no matter where you are, keep kicking fear in the face, because there's a lot of goodness in store on the other side of it.
I hope you got something out of this no matter what season you find yourself in. I know I've mainly been writing travel recommendations on here, but it's my goal to start going deeper than just that in the near future. Stay tuned next week-- I'll be announcing something I've been working on that I'm excited to share!
Thanks so much for stopping by and being willing to follow along on my crazy adventures- wherever they may take me!
xx
Whitney
